Things That Are Not True, and a Card Game That Revealed What Is Wrong With Me.
The Red Cross in Kokshetau is getting a volunteer, and they held an informational session for its staff to which I was invited. They played a game that was supposed to illustrate how people can communicate effectively without words to resolve a problem, but which ended up instead revealing a less ideal side of me, the post-Soviet culture here, and how we relate to each other.
The game was this - the people were divided up into four groups, sitting at four separate tables. Each table was given a set of instructions for a card game which they were to read. I recognized the game as spades except without partners - whoever took the most tricks won. Once everyone had read the instructions, the game began, and no one was allowed to speak. We played a couple hands at our tables, ironing out misundertandings in the rules with hand gestures and facial expressions, and then two winners from each table moved to the next table to play a couple more hands.
The trick was that each table's instructions had a different trump suit. When you switch tables, there's supposed to be a wordless argument about which suit is trump, which results in everyone realizing that they had "come to the table" with different assumptions. When the game was over, and we could talk again, this is what happened at every table except mine. We hadn't had any problems or misunderstandings, we said. Everything went fine.
What happend was this - on the first deal at my new table, the dealer dealt out three extra cards that should have been left out so that everyone had the same hand. When I saw her do this, I very assertively took the extra cards out of the people's dealt hands and set them aside. Although nobody indicated it, this intimidated all the other players (who were all Kazakhstani) at my table, and from then on, I was in charge. After every hand, both out of card-playing habit and everyone else's timid hesitancy to declare a winner, I indicated who had won the hand, and they took the tricks unquestioningly although my instructions were contrary to the rules they had been given. We played three or four games like this, and everyone was satisfied enough to declare that we had had no communication problems.
This is a good lesson for me.
On an unrelated note, here are eleven things I find myself mistakenly believing are true:
11) If you leave dirty socks sitting out long enough, they become clean again.
10) If it has tomatoes in the sauce, it's an awesome pizza.
9) My clothes don't begin to smell bad until I have worn them three to four days in a row.
8) A Wal-Mart wouldn't be so bad.
7) I don't begin to smell bad until I have gone without bathing for three to four days in a row.
6) You can use a hollowed out bread roll instead of a tortilla and it is still a taco.
5) "I finished university" is an acceptable English phrase meaning "I graduated".
4) Cutting in line at the post office is acceptable as long as whatever you need is quick.
3) Personally paying for a cartridge for the school printer and then hiding it so no one else could use it would not make me a jerk.
2) Elbowing a grandma who's trying to cut in line at the post office does not make me a jerk.
1) We don't have problems like this in America.
The game was this - the people were divided up into four groups, sitting at four separate tables. Each table was given a set of instructions for a card game which they were to read. I recognized the game as spades except without partners - whoever took the most tricks won. Once everyone had read the instructions, the game began, and no one was allowed to speak. We played a couple hands at our tables, ironing out misundertandings in the rules with hand gestures and facial expressions, and then two winners from each table moved to the next table to play a couple more hands.
The trick was that each table's instructions had a different trump suit. When you switch tables, there's supposed to be a wordless argument about which suit is trump, which results in everyone realizing that they had "come to the table" with different assumptions. When the game was over, and we could talk again, this is what happened at every table except mine. We hadn't had any problems or misunderstandings, we said. Everything went fine.
What happend was this - on the first deal at my new table, the dealer dealt out three extra cards that should have been left out so that everyone had the same hand. When I saw her do this, I very assertively took the extra cards out of the people's dealt hands and set them aside. Although nobody indicated it, this intimidated all the other players (who were all Kazakhstani) at my table, and from then on, I was in charge. After every hand, both out of card-playing habit and everyone else's timid hesitancy to declare a winner, I indicated who had won the hand, and they took the tricks unquestioningly although my instructions were contrary to the rules they had been given. We played three or four games like this, and everyone was satisfied enough to declare that we had had no communication problems.
This is a good lesson for me.
On an unrelated note, here are eleven things I find myself mistakenly believing are true:
11) If you leave dirty socks sitting out long enough, they become clean again.
10) If it has tomatoes in the sauce, it's an awesome pizza.
9) My clothes don't begin to smell bad until I have worn them three to four days in a row.
8) A Wal-Mart wouldn't be so bad.
7) I don't begin to smell bad until I have gone without bathing for three to four days in a row.
6) You can use a hollowed out bread roll instead of a tortilla and it is still a taco.
5) "I finished university" is an acceptable English phrase meaning "I graduated".
4) Cutting in line at the post office is acceptable as long as whatever you need is quick.
3) Personally paying for a cartridge for the school printer and then hiding it so no one else could use it would not make me a jerk.
2) Elbowing a grandma who's trying to cut in line at the post office does not make me a jerk.
1) We don't have problems like this in America.
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